This week Christina Katz discussed empowerment in The Prosperous Writer. I’m looking forward to exploring this topic. I like empowerment. I like empowering others and feeling empowered myself. The very word empowered makes me smile. I can’t help it.
It’s also odd that this week’s topic is empowerment because my husband and I were just discussing the topic while driving home from Kentucky. I’m concerned about my nieces and nephews and wish to empower them to see their lives don’t have to be what they presently see. I want them to realize they have the power within to envision a different reality for themselves and make it happen. I found that power years ago and I want to show it to them. I’ve taken some criticism and been accused of abandoning my roots for taking steps to create the life I wanted to live. I didn’t abandon my roots because I appreciate them and I don’t forget them; however, I choose to live differently than my upbringing. I kept what served me well, learned from what didn’t, and applied it all to creating my current life. I’m not talking about perfection. I’m talking about finding the power within to change circumstances that don’t serve one’s life goals and make one feel joyful and grounded on a daily basis. My husband pointed out that without daily contact with my nieces and nephew, the influences under which they live are going to be stronger than anything I can do. I accept that reality, but still I must try. If I don’t, what kind of aunt am I? I don’t think empowerment can be shoved down anyone’s throat. The best we can do is open a door and let people choose whether or not to walk through it.
I spend a lot of my time trying to empower others because I know what empowerment has done for me. There have been people throughout my life who have empowered me to dream big, to reach beyond expectations, and to see possibilities. The least I can do is pass that on to other people, so I give it a good faith effort.
When I chaired Murder in the Grove, I felt that part of my role was to empower the authors participating in the panels and workshops to feel confident about their participation in the conference and what they had to offer both in terms of content and their books. It was important to me that lesser known authors be treated with the same dignity by our committee and our vendors as the well known authors in attendance. In turn, I expected the authors to pass on empowerment to the conference attendees. For me, the goal of the conference was to send all those present home with a sense of empowerment to explore their career goals and to know they had contacts to whom they could turn for encouragement or with questions. In turn, I felt empowered by the energy of the conference, the participants, the attendees, and the committee. Eventually though I began to find that I was giving away more empowerment than I was getting in return, and I started to feel depleted. At that point, I needed to re-evaluate my priorities and my role in the conference. The re-evaluation forced me to look at how my own goals had been pushed to the side. I had to find ways to refocus on them and eventually, in part due to the additional challenges a move to a different state brought, found it necessary to resign to focus on my writing.
I actively work to encourage fellow writers on social media sites and in person whenever possible. I find that an encouraging word can make all the difference in times when someone feels less than powerful. Truth be told, I sometimes feel that lacking when I need it in my own life. Usually when that happens I turn to a couple of good friends that I know will remind me of my own power even if I don’t tell them I’m feeling less than empowered at the moment.
Sometimes friends and family will express pain or despair over life circumstances. If I can say something empowering, I do. If I can’t, I let him/her know that I care. Sometimes that’s enough to empower.
I’ve known people who exhausted all my empowerment with their incessant need. I learned that it’s important to replenish one’s supply. If someone is constantly in need of empowerment but completely unable to give back, you may need to pull back from time to time to take care of yourself. Sadly, some people can never get enough empowerment no matter what you do. They are only empowered in the moment the power is given but can’t maintain it beyond that. Those people will leave you feeling used and exhausted. When empowerment works like it should, the person receiving it will either give it back or will pass if forward or both. Either way, he/she will learn to generate their own empowerment.
Every morning take a moment to assess your own sense of empowerment. Do you feel like you can face the chores of the day? Do you feel like you can tackle your latest writing project or other project? Do feel the power within you that gives you the ammunition to proceed? If not, what can you do to find it? For every person, it’s something different. Maybe working out will do it for you. Maybe getting those first words written will do it. Maybe you need to call a friend for encouragement. Maybe you need to reach out to your support system. Tap into your empowerment in the way that works best for you. It may take a few tries before you know your best resource and especially before you can find it internally, but you’ll get there. You have the power!!
I encourage you to try to empower one other person once a week for the next month. It doesn’t have to be the same person. If that works, go for more often - twice a week, three times a week, or even everyday if you have the reserves. You might find you feel more empowered yourself.
Empowerment has the power to travel from one person to another, from one person to a group, from a group to one person, or even within one’s self. Empowerment has the power to wrap itself around a person and radiate from them in every action they take. Empowerment generates more empowerment when treated with integrity. Stand strong in your empowerment and give it freely!
Empowerment is how we move forward. Empowerment is how we create change. Empowerment is how we feel our own strength. Empowerment is how we help others find their strength. Empowerment fills the voids inside. Empowerment tells us we can accomplish our goals and our dreams. Empowerment allows us to stand strong. Empowerment gives us the strength, knowledge, and desire to empower others as well as ourselves.